It's gracious to leave a gratuity. It’s tactful to tip. The word itself was derived from "to insure promptness."
Tipping is a cultural marker. Our European friends are sometimes a bit bemused by the amount of brain sweat we expend in calculating just the right amount to leave for our restaurant servers, our hotel porters, and our coffee-crafting baristas.
But still, it’s central to our culture. It’s built into the way we do business and recreation. Offshore outsiders might look in and shake their heads, but from our perspective it’s an ironclad clause in our social contract.
Tipping is not optional. It simply isn’t.
You know that nationwide, the average hourly wage for restaurant workers is adjusted down to something like $2.13, with the assumption that tips — which must be shared among the entire front-of-house staff — will comprise the majority of the employees’ take-home. Still, even with tips, the median earnings for non-fast-food restaurant workers is less than $9.00 per hour. That’s less than poverty level for a worker supporting a couple of kids.
This report demonstrates how technology is coming to the aid of one chronically under-tipped class — coffee-shop workers. DipJar, a card-swipe-enabled electronic tip jar, allows patrons to quickly authorize preset fund transfers in increments starting at $1. It’s been rolled out to a few independent coffee counters across Manhattan, and is expected to spread nationwide.
Another burgeoning tip-trend, a somewhat less positive one, is that of customer shaming. Servers are snapping pics of less-than-generous receipts and sharing them online. The results have been ugly: reputations have been ruined and people have lost their jobs.
It’s a shame it stoops to that level. Because — let’s say it again together — tipping is not optional. It’s an indelible line item expense for a night out. Or at least it should be.
It’s just this easy: 20 or 25 percent (You can figure that in your head!) for most restaurant bills and cab fares; a buck or two to your bartender, barista, or porter. Do it because it’s the right thing to do, and an irreplaceable part of their wages.
Or do it for the stick rather than the carrot. Tip because you are being judged. You might escape public shaming, but your dinner partners — family, friends, maybe even business associates — are watching. “Character is how you treat those who can do little for you,” goes a currently popular refrain. Demonstrate due consideration for the workers who’ve taken good care of you and your guests, and you’ve demonstrated enviable character.
People notice that sort of thing, and they remember it.
The C4
- People use all sorts of excuses to under-tip, or to skip tipping altogether. “They don’t tip in Europe,” they say, or “A night out is expensive enough as it is.” True, perhaps, but irrelevant.
- Because in our society, a proper gratuity is part of the expense of going out or receiving certain services. We have some leeway in how much we choose to tip, and true enough, we can choose not to tip. But even though we have the freedom to choose that option, we never should.
- The servers and workers who rely on those tips are hurt financially every time folks like us decide not to tip. These are people already living on the margins of wage stability, yet they greet us with warmth and smiles and they do their best to make us feel at home. It’s a crime not to reward that with gratuity.
- And if that doesn’t convince you, maybe fear will. You don’t want to be tagged as a bad tipper, do you? Stiff a server and maybe you won’t make the news, but someone will notice. And that someone will think a bit less of you. In the end your reputation and your self-respect are really all you have. Take this tip and preserve those things, by doing what you know is right every time.